Where would an "A" student be without the help of the teacher who taught them?

A star athlete with all the talent in the world is only as good as the coach who helps develop their ability. In the “Star Wars” trilogy “The Empire Strikes Back” a young Luke Skywalker needs to learn how to become a Jedi Knight, so he seeks the help of Jedi Grand Master, Yoda. Yoda becomes a mentor to Luke Skywalker and he subsequently learns how to master the force. Luke’s success was not just based on his ability but on the mentoring of Yoda.

A mentor is a trustworthy wise counselor who uses their experience to help others. The mentor-mentee relationship is similar to the editor-writer relationship. The editor's objective is to improve an author's writing. Writing, by nature is a subjective process where the author is expressing thoughts from their perspective.

Although an author knows what he or she is trying to say sometimes it is not communicated in a manner that can be clearly understood. An editor serves as an objective party who can see what the author cannot see and make the necessary corrections. Likewise a good mentor looks at their mentee from an objective point of view and offers advice that will help the mentee grow to the next level.

Do you need an editor even though you might not be a writer? Is it a good idea to have a mentor for personal, professional and spiritual development? The answer to both questions is yes. Often times we think of mentoring in the professional context in order to advance our careers. However, there is more to us as individuals than our careers. We have personal areas in our lives where we need assistance and we are spiritual people who deep down have a longing to know God.

Since no man can pass a human audit it is important that we have objective people in our lives who can act as mentors by giving us constructive criticism. God only gave us one set of eyes but we can see a lot more through the extra set of eyes He can give us through a mentor. If two drunks only receive counsel from one another it is not likely that they will ever get sober. With this thought in mind we must understand that the mentor and the mentee are not equal.

What qualifies an individual to be a mentor is that they are more mature than their mentee and they have been where the mentee is going. The mentor is willing to share wisdom through their experience and offer support and encouragement. Conversely, the mentee has to have a teachable spirit and a humble willingness to learn. Have you ever met a “know it all?”

Some people cannot be taught because they have a hard heart and what is said goes in one ear and out the other. Would you rather pour water on fertile soil with good seed or hard concrete? If you pour water on good soil it is likely that the seed will grow, but if you pour water on hard concrete it is just going to get wet.

The point is that a mentor must possess good seed and be willing to liberally pout out their water and seed to the mentee. It is equally important that the mentee has to be like fertile soil in order for the seed to grow.

So how do you know if God has ordained someone to be your mentor? First the individual should have God as their moral center and be willing to share His wisdom. Second, they should have demonstrated that they have your best interest at heart. Third, if they agree with you all the time they are probably a better flunky than a mentor. Fourth, they cannot be afraid to speak the truth in love. If they have to choose the truth over your feelings it is imperative that they tell the truth.

As a matter of fact any author who is worth their salt wants an editor to find their mistakes so that they can get corrected and make them look good.  In order for this to happen the author has to be willing to submit to their editor’s advice. Likewise, we should embrace those people who God sends in our lives to help us see that which we are blind to. The pain of cutting the fat may not be pleasant at first but in the long run we will be better off for the experience.

So which are you, the mature person who needs to be a mentor by sharing your wisdom with others or the person with potential who needs the help that a mentor can provide?

		As the CEO of Embrace Relationships Seminars, Elder Dane Cunnigham is the author of “Take a Look Within” and “Risky Relationships” - books that deal with self development and relationships from God’s point of view. For more information about Elder Cunnigham and Embrace Relationship Seminars, log onto www.eldercunningham.com *Elder Cunningham is a 2009 StreamingFaith.com Guest Columnist.

© Elder Dane T. Cunningham all rights reserved.